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Friday, October 15, 2004
Delayed Debate Commentary
by Cordeiro
With apologies for the delay in transcribing Vinny and Guido's debate commentary, here it is. As you will no doubt remember, Vinny and Guido normally provide color commentary for boxing and professional wrestling and have recently entered the political fray. They would've done live commentary, however they were busy cleaning up a "family" cemetery someplace in Queens.

But we digress.

Lurch: Being lectured by the president on fiscal responsibility is a little bit like Tony Soprano talking to me about law and order in this country.

Guido: Senator, I know Tony Soprano. Tony Soprano is a friend of mine and you, sir, are no Tony Soprano!

Lurch: I was hunting in Iowa last year with a sheriff from one of the counties there, and he pointed to a house in back of us, and said, "See the house over? We just did a drug bust a week earlier, and the guy we arrested had an AK-47 lying on the bed right beside him.

Vinny: Um, Senator, are you aware that last year the Assault Weapons Ban was IN PLACE?!? How did the guy get a 'banned' gun? Maybe the ban only applied to law abiding citizens and not criminals?

Lurch: You just heard the president say that young people ought to be able to take money out of Social Security and put it in their own accounts. Now, my fellow Americans, that's an invitation to disaster.

Guido: Oh, yeah. Let me get this straight. Allowing me to take some of my money and invest it for my retirement is an invitation to disaster. Disaster for you and your money grubbing, wealth redistributing cohorts, but not for me.
Well said, gentlemen (excluding Lurch, of course).

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