Wednesday, November 17, 2004
"No Fish Left Behind"
Just when you thought you'd heard it all, the whackos from the extreme left give you something else to laugh about.
PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) has launched a new campaign titled the "Fish Empathy Project".
According to the AP (read the ludicrous for yourself):
"Animal-rights activists have launched a novel campaign arguing that fish — contrary to stereotype — are intelligent, sensitive animals no more deserving of being eaten than a pet dog or cat."Sensitive animals, yes. Why, I recall having a very touching conversation with a fish once, and I do believe it changed my life.
"Once people start to understand that fish, although they come in different packaging, are just as intelligent, they'll stop eating them," said Bruce Friedrich, PETA's director of vegan outreach.Well, if fish are so intelligent, why on earth don't they swim away from fishing nets? When they see a minnow dangling in open water, why do they not question this as odd, and recognize the old adage, "if it seems to good to be true, it probably is"? If they are so intelligent, wouldn't they say, "Hmmm, how often do I see minnows just hanging there like that, waiting to be eaten? Could this be a trap? Remember what happened to Frank last week, he told me about a worm hanging out in the open, and I haven't heard from him since."
Another PETA Empathy staffer, wise after 24 entire years on this animal-eating planet, had this to say:
"Fish are so misunderstood because they're so far removed from our daily lives," said Karin Robertson, 24, the Empathy Project manager and daughter of an Indiana fisheries biologist. "They're such interesting, fascinating individuals, yet they're so incredibly abused."Well if this child isn't a product of the Clinton era. "Fish are misunderstood!" We, as humans, are responsible for not making the fish part of our daily lives. We've made them outcasts, relegating them to polluted oceans. It's not enough that we go to the aquariums in our cities to visit them once a year. We really need to do more. We need to try to understand fish, and empathize with their feelings.
It's just a shame that John Kerry wasn't elected, as I'm sure he would have enacted legislation (for once in his life) to end the abuse of fish. Yes, I'm sure he would have supported "No Fish Left Behind" that Ted Kennedy has proposed.
While we're at it, what about plants? Plants have feelings too, don't they? Is it fair to harvest crops, with those big machines and sharp blades? Is it really fair to eat lettuce? And those poor peas, plucked out of their pods and thrust into boiling steam, all for the culinary pleasures of humans.
What about air? There are organisms floating around in the air, and we humans breathe them in. We should seek their feelings first. Isn't that a violation of the organisms' rights? Yes, it is, and I propose that we boycott air... starting with the folks over at PETA.
With that I return to my capitalist endeavors.