Wednesday, February 02, 2005
Lurch's Search For Relevance
Meet the Press really needs to fire its guest booking agent. On the day of the very first democratic election in the history of Iraq, a day which could possibly stand as the beginning of a new era in the Middle East, who pray tell was the main guest on the show?
John F. "Lurch" Kerry, Junior Senator from the Commonwealth of Massachusetts. Full Disclosure mandates that I tell you Brian Williams did give a live report from Baghdad, but Lurch the Loser took the lion's share of the hour.
For the record, I believe Lurch the Loser was hoping and praying for disaster on Iraq's election day. He really, really, really wanted to do the political equivalent of the Dance of Joy over the failure of Iraqi elections and the carnage that was supposed to come with it.
The only problem with his wish is that it didn't come true, therefore he had to field questions about reality - a state with which he is wholly unfamiliar.
Reality is, Lurch ended up on the losing side of the presidential election. He tried to make it look like he only lost Ohio and if 50,000 people would've changed their minds he would be sitting in the big chair today.
Lurch the Loser's grasp of reality is only slightly better that is Babs Boxer's.
Somebody needs to show Lurch a map. It wasn't 50,000 votes. It was 3,000,165. He can complain all he wants about election results, but in the end the only result that matters is in the win/loss column. The American people weighed him in the balance, and he was found wanting.
A man said to the universe: "Sir I exist!"I predict this past Meet the Press will be one of the last major appearances of Lurch the Loser before the MSM. You see, even the MSM is driven by the almighty capitalistic engine of ratings. Americans gravitate toward winners, and that is one title to which Lurch will never be entitled.
"However," replied the universe, "The fact has not created in me a sense of obligation."
Here endeth the lesson.