Tuesday, November 01, 2005
Dusty Harry Throws A Tantrum
Somedays its hard being an adult, especially when you have to deal with other people's bratty kids. Bratty kids have a nasty habit of throwing tantrums. Sometimes they just sit there and scream. Though annoying, this is pretty easy to ignore, and eventually said bratty kid realizes nobody is paying attention to him.
Then the Bratty Kid takes it to the next tantrum level. This consists of him stomping his feet and holding his breath. Again, fairly easy to ignore because breathing is an involuntary reflex. The Bratty Kid may pass out, but he'll start breathing again shortly.
On occasion, the adult finds himself in a public forum with a Bratty Kid. This gives the Bratty Kid an opportunity to embarrass the Adult in a location where the Bratty Kid cannot be effectively disciplined. Usually this entails the Bratty Kid falling to the floor, and entertaining the public with a fit of kicking and screaming. The Adult is then forced to remove the Bratty Kid from the public forum.
The aforementioned paragraphs explain roughly what happened on the floor of the US Senate today. The Senate Jackass Caucus, effectively represented by Senate Minority Leader Dusty Harry (D-Circus Circus) and his sidekick Dick Durbin (D-Ill). Having been severely disappointed by the non-indictment of Karl "Sith Lord" Rove and thereby being deprived of yet another opportunity to skewer-by-proxy W, Dusty Harry and Dick Durbin proceeded to throw a tantrum on the Senate floor. They invoked a little used (as in not in the past 30 years or so) rule - Rule XXI - that enables them to take the Senate into closed session - thereby ceasing the little that actually happens on the floor.
Their cover story is a worn out demand to investigate the possible alleged manipulation of intelligence in order to justify the invasion of Iraq. They're outraged they can't get anyone to pay attention to their crackpot conspiracy theories.
Why doesn't anyone pay attention to their crackpot conspiracy theories? Because of the crackpot conspiracy theories.
Somedays I feel like Dennis Miller.
What Dusty Harry and Dick Durbin managed to do was make themselves look like a bunch of whining four-year-olds who've been kicked out of the sandbox.
Memo to Dusty Harry: If you want to investigate your crackpot conspiracy theories, you need do but one thing - Win an election. It might help if you stopped whining.
Here endeth the lesson.