Tuesday, April 11, 2006
Scotch On The Mall
Among my many talents I count the ability to speak, read, and write in the Portuguese and Spanish languages. I have, in the past, used these skills in my employment, so I consider myself a professional linguist.
For those of you in Rio Linda, that means I can make a living speaking more than just English.
I have heard Spanish spoken well, and I've heard it spoken badly, both by Americans attempting to communicate and Hispanics attempting to speak the language of their forefathers. In all my years of bi-lingualism, I have never, ever, heard the Spanish language so thoroughly slaughtered as I did yesterday by Ted "Dude, Where's My Scotch" Kennedy as he addressed the assembled throngs of immigrants on the National Mall.
His attempts at Spanish have earned him a new SOTR moniker. From now on, when speaking on immigrant issues, Scotch will be referred to as Eduardo "Chavo, donde está mi Tequila" Kennedy.
Political Pitbull has the video.
Scotch Kennedy is nearly as incoherent in English as he is in Spanish. This rally took place in the afternoon, so evidently he'd already had time for his daily consultations with the Three Wise Men - those being Jack Daniels, Jim Beam, and Johnny Walker.
For the record, Scotch, Martin Luther King's rally took place at the Lincoln Memorial. That big stone pointy structure behind you is the Washington Monument. Work on your facts, Scotch. Sí, Se Puede.
Here endeth the lesson.